The Hills: an aftermath update – week 3

Old habits never die (Photo by Oreos via Wikimedia)

Last week was filled with ups and downs, he said she said, but most importantly, Kristen was blown off by Mr. Justin Bobby.

You, me, and the rest of the population who secretly watches this show could have seen it coming a mile away.  He’s a bad boy. I get it.  She wears a broken halo. No problem, but what happen to the saying that two wrongs don’t make a right? Just because they like irritating everyone around them doesn’t mean they’re a match made in heaven.  They may not last, but at least they’re entertaining to watch.

This week begins with Kristin wanting to start a battle royal with Justin after he ditched her at Brody’s birthday.  She has already said she doesn’t plan on putting up with Justin’s games, but she sure seems to be stepping up to bat every time. On a trip home she even mentions Justin to her parents, but explains he’s not the type to bring home to dad.  She doesn’t want a relationship with him, yet she’s already talking about him to her parents?  The contradictions are ridiculous in this show.

Audrina is basically in the same boat as Kristen. She can’t stop talking about Justin, even when she goes on another date with Derek (again, let’s not forget he’s Justin’s best friend).  Instead of getting to know Derek, asking about his hobbies and what he does, she makes sure to keep the topic on Justin.  When Derek finally asks the pink elephant question (Is she really over him?), Audrina blows the question of with a shrug and a “yeah.”  No one needs to be a psychology major to read the giant BS sign over her head.

Holly, Heidi’s sister, is invited to a big networking party involving Bolthouse Productions.  Holly’s passionate love affair with alcohol is on public display as she basically makes an ass of herself at the party. I’m also sure it didn’t help Heidi score any brownie points with her boss.

After Holly’s drunken wild antics, Heidi is pushed to step up to be a big girl, an adult, and have a serious conversation with her sister.  Of course serious discussions about alcohol abuse must be discussed over lunch and margaritas.  Instead of Heidi being the one to confront her sister, she as usual begins the conversation and Spencer takes command after the first 20 seconds.  Spencer, this is not an AA meeting and you are nowhere near being a licensed counselor. I wouldn’t be surprised if you have someone hired to tie your shoes. Help Holly in the right direction to get help.  She doesn’t need to sit on a couch with you and hear what you have to say, Oprah.

As Kristen returns back to Malibu, she walks into Justin making her dinner, stalker style, in her kitchen.  I’m sorry but I would find it just a tad creepy to find some guy I’m dating standing in my kitchen cooking dinner uninvited.  Instead of asking questions like “how did you get in my house?” and “what the hell to you think you’re doing?” she nonchalantly walks into her kitchen to pry an apology out of Justin.  Being the girl she is, Justin wins her over with dinner and an apology.  Were these the games that she wasn’t going to play? Weird, because for a second I could have sworn I saw a blonde Audrina sitting there. Oh nope it’s still Kristen.

Even though Kristen may be into Justin and vice versa, those two are always holding other plans in their back pocket. Kristen stops by Brody’s apartment. When Brody is asked whether his girlfriend Jade knows Kristen is there his response is, “Uh, she knows from when you first came into town, that I told her, I made it very clear that like Kristen is my good friend. Yes we have a past but she’s one of my closest friends and you have nothing to worry about.” So to break that down, he means no.  I want every girl to know, when a guys says anything along the same thing that Brody said, he means no. Don’t take it any other way. If she really did know, he would’ve said yes. It’s that simple.

While Kristen is explaining the whole Justin-Kristen-Audrina scene to Brody, Justin comes to a late night meeting with Audrina on a candle lit rooftop. Apparently Audrina invited Justin to meet her just so they could break the awkwardness between them.  For some reason I’m thinking this is defiantly not going to help.

They confess they still have feelings for each other (HUGE surprise) and Justin explains his nonexistent hurt feeling when Audrina went out on a date with Derek. Then he gets her hook-line-and-sinker with this line, “I would never be able to say anything was better than Audrina Patridge, ever.” Then like butter, she melted into the couch.  I think he even added some watery eyes action too.  What a player.  It’s their own fault if either one of these girls trips over themselves while trying to chase this cornball. Oh what a cheeseball.

Check in next week for another aftermath update of The Hills.